they will see us waving from suchgreatheights

i have dreamt that i would be given the previlege of living a good life. one that i might always be happy, always laughing, always smiling. without anyone, anything making me feel sad. yet there's this hollow, this endless blackness that never seems to leave me alone. sometimes i feel like it's just me, it's always me. there really isnt much, to be upset about. maybe when i was born, i already a defect in me, a fuse cut off, a fuse that is supposed to make me happy. really happy. i can easily blend into a background, become invisible and remain invisible. honestly, there are bigger things in life. the trepidation of the earth killing millions, the number of children suffering, dying in 3rd world countries. and honestly, i don't give a crap. the selfishness i see makes me hate myself, abhor myself. all that jackshit. i feel scared. i feel homeless with a home to go to. i don't really know. anymore.

i just want to be happy.

i don't want to obsess. MUST not obsess. love hot guy anyway. hot guy offered drink! yay.

gala night tonight..to go or not to go?
music:ppl talking. and hot guy talking:)