they will see us waving from suchgreatheights

a new fresh batch of hormones have arrived and thus resulting in my oversensitivity. how timely. feeling incredibly stupid for throwing myself off like that. but i guess we're all prone to mistakes. everyone's subjected to bouts of emotional neediness. and that we keep letting all the insecurities get to us. guess what he says is right. u deal with it, u get move on, u learn from it.

ineffectuality is the cause of my disatisfaction.

i guess the facade i put up can be easily seen through at times. but the little membrane of fragility is falling apart and making me one sad lonely girl. whatever it is, i dont really want to think about it anymore. i cringe in my seat as my dad tells me that i need to talk. but i dont want to talk. you understand?

forgiven if you dont. i guess it's just me. how i am accustomed to be. picked up 'prozac nation' and started to read it. her words have once again pressed itself against my heart. enstranged by all that has taken place, i cannot help but to find comfort that i am not alone. and that someone out there feels this same way. life gets you going sometimes, you cant help but to move along with it. in all the hussle and bussle, you dont forget, we, people like that, just can't let it go. becos of all the damned pain, the fact that you cant let anyone know. and when you try to get people to understand, their tone of complete ignorance would completely crush you like a insect being stepped on the soles of your shoes.

despite all that, i think im going to be okay. ive got love on my side now. and i think it might just hold out long enough, if i give him and i a chance. i just have to learn. baby steps.

gotta start packing and my mom is giving me quite a bit to shop. hurrah. (i dont sound half as excited, but really, im jumping as i even think abt it)

mary and i got tickets to TRL, but it's on 9th of May!chickenbacksidebaboonshit.-

nonetheless, i am happy enough that i get to see my babygirl.:) ah!