they will see us waving from suchgreatheights

..you know what i was thinking. i was thinking if i anything i ever do can make them happy. i am thinking not.
i am thinking how come i cant seem to get them to understand that it's not a natural reaction for me to be compelled into talking. that when i have something to tell them, i will. i really rather be alone and not get them to be frustrated over me. because you know, the last thing i need is a guilt trip for no apparent reason. i am rather happier this way, i am happier being the way i am, and not let anyone bother me. so please tell me what i can do to stop this from happening. stop the yelling, just stop all of it. teach me how not to feel bad, teach me how to be the person that you want me to be. cos all i do never seems to be good enough for you. please teach me, please help me, because as it is, i am at my wits' end. i just dont know what to do anymore. i really really dont/

how come im so useless, i'll never know.