they will see us waving from suchgreatheights

once a bloop, always a bloop.
these girls make my life worthwhile. it's amazing what almost a decade of friendship can do. YES I COUNTED. fuck im old. but whatever. it's always the same whenever i see them. we bitch, we laugh till our insides hurt, we eat rubbish, we drink rubbish, and in the end go back feeling very tired, but very very happy. i love u bloopies:)

gripes/ramblings about the world as it is:
1) cute guys either of the options below-
(a) taken
(b) by ugly girlfriends, to say the very least
(c) jerkoffs
(d) arrogant fucktards
(e) speak chinese and minus 100 brownie points
(f) players
(g) have stupid friends
(h) personality disorders (ie. EXTREMELY lame, EXTREMELY stupid, etc)

[really i could go on and on]

2) the point about hypocrisy-
been thinking about friendships and hypocrisy. where do we draw the line?
i have friends who gripe about their other friends, annoyance with their actions and such. while i myself carry out these acts myself (ie. bitching about my so-called "friends" and then still BE their "friend" at the end of the day), i still think it's complete bullshit. i care alot about some people, but do they care about me? that i cant really be sure. where do real friendships come to be considered real per se? to me, if u dont like someone, u shld tell it as it is. and dont put on the false pretense of being chummy, when at the end of the day, ure talking shit about that person. or at the very least, act nonchalant about whole thing. in the first place, a friend would put in time and effort to keep up with others. and not to drop a sudden msg, HEY LET'S GO OUT AND MEET. when i havent heard from you in like months. and all ive tried then was to get u to go out. and it's really tiring to hear the same old shit, about being busy. everyone's busy. you make the time, make the commitment to make a friendship work. dont expect me to be your friend when after months of no contact, and even after relentless tries, u wanna "catch up". i dont think it's very fair.

3) clubbing and such-
phuture has been the bane of my uni clubbing days. and well last wednesday was no different. of course a drunk yos is always fun. i love a drunk yos, she's so much more fun than regular yos. we laughed like hyenas, made friends with not ONE but TWO cute army boys. unfortunately, they speak chinese, but then again seems like the whole world is chinese. wadssup with that i wonder? i mean english IS our first language after all. oh and for all with lesbian fetishes, u'd be delighted to know that me and yos "made out". hahahha.

4) dancetitude-
lots of problems, and unhappiness that i cant even begin to start on. i heard some rumours here and there and all i can say is fuck u elitists. u do know that there are others who exist dont u? that there are other ppl who love dance as much as you do or maybe even more. that there are other ppl who put in so much effort yet can never become better, no matter how much they've tried, while it seems easy for u. i care, i do give a shit, but so what. do others give a shit that i give a shit? obviously not. all they want is to recruit the dancers that they like and exercise favoritism. there are other people doing more items just because they are favoured. while ppl like me, ppl like me who are really passionate about dance, who would do anything just to have the chance to be up on stage, doing the one thing that i actually give a shit about, end up feeling like a complete piece of trash.

5) THE ugly past-
to be very honest, i wish not to be reminded about my past. SO LET IT GO ALREADY. i dont think there's a need for me to see someone who i really REALLY REALLY (i cannot emphasize the REALLY anymore than i already can), dont care about. it happens it happens. if it doesnt, all's good with me:)

sigh im so unhappy la. :(

music: 30 seconds to mars- the kill